Etiquette I've worn too long

Here some few assumptions, stepping to conclusions is convenient, isn t it ? ...

Eva is only about intellectual stuff, not good with manual stuff :
Well, learn that she knows how to arrange flower, gardening, cooking, drawing

Eva is shy
Nop, she respects the others or people take all the room.  

Eva is too nice
Well people should learn to hear when I say NO, hey folks I am surrrre you have ears  ^^

Eva does not know what she wants
In fact, she does, she just does not want to hurt someone in the process or have her dreams crashed by jealous ones.

So you might think before speaking of what you ignore. Stop distording reality
Eva knows her better than you do, it is just logic, she had lived every experience of her life ...

When you recognize and love your true self, you’ll understand it’s okay to say “no” when you need to. It doesn’t make you selfish or unlikable. It makes you authentic. And guess what? People respect authenticity. They admire those who stand their ground and respect their own boundaries.

So, get to know yourself and discover what you genuinely want. That will help you learn to love yourself for who you are.

The more you understand and appreciate yourself, the easier it’ll become to say “no” when something doesn’t serve you. Remember, it’s your life. Make it about your choices.
6 Tips to Know Yourself Better
1. Practice journaling

The Self-Discovery Bundle is a great way to start because it’ll help you know yourself better by using beginner-friendly guided journaling.

With it, you’ll get a set of seven journaling workbooks designed to help you discover and understand your:

feelings
dreams
fears
mindset
strengths
self-talk
habits.

What makes these workbooks different from many others is that the prompts are clear, and each page includes an explanation about the prompt to help you dig deeper.

Plus, they each include a model workbook with sample answers to guide you in case you don’t know how to answer one of the prompts.

The Self-Discovery Bundle is designed to help people like you find direction in life through fun and thought-provoking journaling prompts.

It’s the tool I wish I had on hand when I felt lost and stuck a couple of years ago, so I’m confident it’s going to make a difference in your life.

Becoming self-aware and being in touch with yourself at every moment is the most solid foundation to build an intentional life, and I’m sure journaling can help you get there.

You can also practice journaling using questions to help you know yourself better, like these self-discovery prompts for example.
2. Let yourself grow and change

Knowing yourself doesn’t mean you have to stay in a box and be so sure of what you are, that you’ll never change.

Absolutely everything that happens around you, from big to small things, like:

watching an impactful movie
meeting someone new
getting a pet for the first time

can impact you enough to change you forever.

Knowing yourself means also knowing you’re a human being who’s constantly evolving and growing.

Don’t limit yourself to a set of adjectives that describe you right now and call it a day.

Like I said before, self-discovery is a life-long journey that never stops.
3. Study your environment

Taking responsibility for your own life is key to self-growth.

However, there’s no denying that your environment plays a key role in who you are.

To understand and know yourself better, analyze the people you spend the most time with or the things you do the most.

Do you seem to attract problematic people? What do you think that says about you?
4. Put intention behind everything you do

Practice doing things intentionally instead of just doing them because you’re supposed to, or because you’ve always done them.

To do things with intention, simply ask yourself “Why am I doing this? And why am I doing it this way?” every time you’re about to do something, anything.

I know it can be hard to remember, but after doing it the first couple of times you’ll see the impact this has on you and probably want to continue doing it.
5. Challenge the stories you tell yourself

Every time you’re coming up with your own explanations or conclusions for things you’re not really sure about, pay attention.

For instance, if a coworker doesn’t invite you to her baby shower and you think you two are closed enough for you to go, how do you react?

If you start rambling about all the reasons why she must be mad at you instead of going straight to ask her why, this is a good chance for you to explore your self-talk and the stories you tell yourself.

We call them “stories” not necessarily because they’re entirely fictional.

They could be based on past experiences that taught you something about how people behave, for example, and then you got stuck thinking it applies to every situation in life.

However, they aren’t entirely true either.

And they can be both negative and positive.

Analyzing the ways you react under these circumstances can teach you a lot about yourself because you’ll start to notice patterns like:

“Everyone’s mad at me for no apparent reason” when in reality people are just busy and sometimes they just forget about things;
“I’m always defensive” when in reality you’ve tried to be polite in a specific situation before but now you’re reaching the top limits of your patience;
“I’m so funny and even though my jokes are offensive, my coworkers get them and love them,” when in reality people are just trying to avoid an awkward situation, so they laugh about your offensive jokes
“I procrastinate a lot,” when what’s actually happening is that you don’t understand the task at hand and also need a break.

The Self-Talk Workbook included in the Self-Discovery Bundle will help you dig deeper into this to help you:

uncover the stories you tell yourself
find the root of those stories
turn your inner critic into your biggest cheerleader.

6. Get to the bottom of the issue

From now on, get into the habit of trying to find the root of your feelings.

For instance, saying you don’t like your job is just the surface of the issue.

What exactly do you dislike about it?

So, every time you say you like or don’t like something, ask yourself why.

Let’s say you’re overwhelmed, for example.

Instead of just accepting this state of tension, dig deeper. Ask yourself, “Why do I feel overwhelmed?“

Maybe your answer is, “Because I have too much work.”

Again, ask yourself, “Why do I have too much work?“

Perhaps the answer is, “Because I can’t say ‘no’ to people.”

Now, the root issue becomes clear: You need to establish boundaries and learn to assertively decline extra tasks that overburden you.

This process of continuous self-questioning peels back the layers of surface emotions, revealing the core issues that truly need your attention.
3 Wrong Signs You Don’t Know Yourself

There are a couple of things you could be confusing with not knowing yourself.
1. You’ve changed your mind about things

Changing your mind could mean you don’t know yourself, but it can also mean you’re trying to adapt to different situations very quickly.

It can also mean your priorities aren’t clear.

However, keep in mind that you’re always changing and evolving.

If you loved your career 10 years ago but now you don’t, that doesn’t mean you didn’t know yourself.

It can only mean you’ve changed, and that’s okay.
2. You change how you behave according to who you’re with

This doesn’t mean you don’t know yourself because we all adapt to different social situations, and that’s actually part of what makes us successful at being social.

You can be serious and professional in one setting, and very funny and goofy in others.

You can be loving with some people and tough with others.

And that takes me to my last point in this section.
3. You can’t define yourself using adjectives

Some people freak out when they realize they go blank when trying to describe themselves.

Maybe this has happened to you; you tried to give a list of adjectives that describe you and realized you couldn’t.

You either couldn’t think of a single one or thought of so many, many of them were conflicting.

Well, you’re a complex human being and the words you choose to describe yourself don’t depend on who you are, but on the situation.

You can be many things at once.

And if you try to come up with words that describe you, you’ll realize some of them are incompatible with others on your list because you can be:

patient in some situations but impatient in others;
organized for some things and disorganized for others;
quiet and shy in front of some people, and outgoing in front of others.

And no, that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you.

Enjoy the complexity and the beauty of being human, and stop trying to put yourself in a box
10 Questions to Help You Know Yourself Better

Here are ten insightful questions that can serve as the starting point for your journey of self-knowledge:

What are the values that guide my decisions and actions?
In what situations do I feel most authentic and true to myself?
How do I respond to stress or adversity? What coping mechanisms do I use?
What are the experiences or moments in life that have significantly shaped the person I am today?
What are the activities or hobbies that genuinely make me happy and fulfilled?
What are my strengths, and how do I leverage them in my everyday life?
What are the areas in my life that I feel need improvement? How can I work on them?
How do I manage my time? Am I investing it in things that truly matter to me?
Who are the people that have influenced me the most? Why and how have they made such an impact on me?
How do I define success? What do I want from life, and what am I doing to achieve it?

And you can also check out this huge list of questions to learn more about yourself
The Bottom Line

You know, I truly believe that knowing yourself is a lifelong journey. We’re constantly changing, evolving, and growing, and that’s what makes life so beautiful and exciting.

It’s important to embrace every stage of your life and love yourself through it all.

Remember, every experience, big or small, has shaped who you are today, so never regret anything you’ve been through before.

Take a few minutes every day to really tune in to how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking. It’s amazing how this simple practice can help you feel more connected to yourself and, ultimately, lead you to a more fulfilling and authentic life.

Keep shining, and never stop exploring the incredible depths of who you are!